Here's a way you can instantly start feeling better about yourself:
Live for tomorrow.
Whatever you're about to do, are you going to be happy about it tomorrow?
Like, smoking that cigarette... are you going to be happy you did that, tomorrow?
Like, drinking that entire bottle of wine by yourself?
... Is tomorrow-you gonna be happy about that?
(Sometimes, the answer could be yes, by the way. It all depends on context.)
Okay, I know... so far this sounds just like typical pop-culture self-help bullshit that just makes you feel bad about yourself...
But here's why this is actually important:
Every time you live by your impulses rather than your judgment, you're triggering GUILT and SHAME.
When we do things we KNOW we shouldn't do AS we're doing it... it makes us feel BAD.
If you want to quit smoking but keep giving in to those cravings... you hate yourself a little bit more with every cigarette.
If you're trying to stop drinking, but then keep drinking, every glass makes you feel a little bit shittier about yourself.
Every time you follow your urges rather than your judgment, it eats away a little bit more at your self-esteem.
You trust yourself less and less.
You start living in your head more and more...
... Until your thoughts and emotions end up leading you down an endless downward spiral of chaotic energy, negative thoughts, low self-esteem, depression and self-hatred.
That's why having a tool like "how will I feel about this tomorrow?" can be an easy way to start making better decisions.
It's a way to get you OUT of the downward spiral and ONTO an upward spiral of success.
Look at this from Tomorrow-You's perspective:
If you consistently live your life HAPPY with what you did YESTERDAY -- the opposite starts happening.
You suddenly feel GOOD about yourself.
You start TRUSTING yourself again.
How would you feel about yourself if you KNEW you could always trust yourself to do the things you tell yourself you're going to do?
Self-esteem goes up. Self-respect shoots through the roof.
The spark in your eye comes back.
You start to feel ALIVE again.
The kid in you who wanted to be a goddamn astronaut?
Once you start getting rid of some of that head-trash, you'll notice that he didn't go anywhere.
You just couldn't hear him above the noise of your self-doubt, guilt & shame.
Now, suddenly, you start feeling like you can conquer the world.
All because you started making choices for the TOMORROW-YOU instead of the right-now-you.
Start with small things.
Focus on easy wins.
Make your bed. Brush your teeth. Do 2 push-ups every time you take a shit. Drink a liter of water first thing in the morning.
Feel good about it. Thank yourself for doing it. Use the increased emotional energy to tackle bigger things.
And never stop growing.
You'll notice you start becoming a lot more POWERFUL when you're not at war with yourself.
All that emotional energy you were spending beating yourself up?
You can now use that as FUEL to build the life you want.
To take this a step further:
One of the things all the world's most successful people have in common is LONG TERM THINKING.
Notice how Jeff Bezos has completely dominated the world over the past couple of years?
You can read about how he planned to do that in his Letters To Shareholders he published in the late 1990s.
The world's highest performers are not thinking like you and me.
They are operating on decade-long timescales.
They are playing chess, not checkers.
Many of the most successful companies have 50-year and 100-year plans.
Nearly every single self-made multi-millionaire has a long term vision for their life.
Becoming successful, in a lot of ways, starts with simply knowing what you want.
Most people only have a VAGUE idea of what they want their life to look like...
... but they have a very SPECIFIC idea of what they DON'T want.
And most end up having EXACTLY what they don't want.
(This is not a coincidence.)
“One day Alice came to a fork
in the road and saw a
Cheshire cat in a tree.
‘Which road do I take?’ she
‘Where do you want to go?’
was his response.
‘I don’t know,’ Alice
‘Then,’ said the cat,
‘it doesn’t matter.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland